Tag: Bible

  • I Didn’t Plan This Trip – The Road is Getting Harder

    “My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind.”  James 1:2-6

    This is not the blog I wanted to write. I wanted to talk about some funny things that happen. I’d rather talk about how God has answered our prayers lately. But I just can’t. My heart is breaking into a million pieces. Maybe another day.

              After Larry started taking a medication for his mood swings, I began to see his old personality come back, and I thought Yes, we can do this. When we would have a special moment together, share a kiss and a hug, I thought Yes, we can do this. Those times made it ok that I was having to take over all the responsibilities of taking care of the house and having to hire people to do the yard and repairs. It was ok because I could see glimpses of my husband and our love.

              Suddenly, things changed almost overnight. He suddenly became very confused, like he’d not been before. After two trips to the ER, the second one at 3:30 am in an ambulance, the doctor told me what was happening to my husband. The diagnosis was that he had Acute Delirium. It can happen for several reasons, but it’s not uncommon in Alzheimer’s patients. It may or may not lessen, it could even go away temporarily.

              This is how it went with Larry’s dad. He would talk to people who weren’t there, hear or see things that weren’t there. He even called the police once because these imaginary people wouldn’t leave the house. We tried having him stay with us, but that didn’t work out, Larry’s niece tried staying with him at night at his house, but that didn’t last long either. The family had no choice but to place him in a memory care facility because there was no one he’d let take care of him.  

              This is where we are. I’m trying to work with the VA to get him Home Health, hoping having someone else come tend to him  a couple of days a week might help. But the VA doesn’t make it easy. If that fails, we’ll use his Medicare and see what they will cover. But I’m not ready yet to place him in a facility. Not yet.

              I’m requesting prayer from all my praying friends. I need wisdom on what to do, and we need favor with the VA, and we need a doctor to verify this is what he needs. The ER doctor said it verbally, but I need it in writing. Yes, the road had gotten very difficult, but one thing I know – my God is faithful and He will see us through.   

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

  • I Didn’t Plan This Trip – Cold Coffee

    “Because of the Lord’s faithful love we do not perish, for His mercies never end.

    They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness!

    I say: The Lord is my portion, therefore I will put my hope in Him.”

    Lamentations 3:22-24 (Holman Christian Standard Bible)

              My favorite time of day used to be early mornings, when I would be the only one up. I’d enjoy a nice cup of coffee, or sometimes hot tea, while I read my Bible and prayed. I still enjoy those things, but not always in the usual way I used to know. Some days are easier than others, and some days are difficult to say the least. The best days are the ones when we don’t have to be anywhere, and can just take the day as it comes.

              I make my coffee, and about that time Larry puts the dog out of the bedroom because she’s wanting out. I open the dog door to let her out and feed her, put Larry’s bowl for cereal on the island and unload the dishwasher. A few minutes later, he’s up and usually needs a little help with shoes and socks. We get that done, and it’s time for breakfast. If we get the bowl of cereal and milk to the table without spilling, that’s a plus! Otherwise, I’m moping at least part of the kitchen floor.

              After he’s had his breakfast and taken his morning meds, he usually settles on the couch and watches reruns of M.A.S.H. or Andy Griffin. I shower and dress while he’s not needing me. At last, I’m ready for my day. But first I need to carry out garbage. And finish cleaning the kitchen. Oh yeah, I need to decide what to make for dinner and set something out to thaw. I make the beds because a nicely made bed makes me feel good about one thing being done well today.

              As I leave the bedroom to go to my workspace or the office, I see my cup of coffee sitting on the side table where I’d left it to go let the dog out. It’s cold by now. But hey, it’s summer, I’ll just add some ice and pretend I’d planned it that way.

              “The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, And He delights in his way.” Psalm 37:23 (NKJV)

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

  • I Didn’t Plan This Trip – Making Choices

              “I call heaven and earth as witnesses today against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both you and your descendants may live”  Deuteronomy 30:9

    In the course of our lives, we have to make many choices. Whether to follow Jesus and choose Him is a major one. Choosing whether to marry, have children, where to live, starting or leaving a job, all important choices most of us have had to make at some point in our lives. Daily decisions like what to eat for lunch, what to wear, whether to get up with the alarm or to push the snooze button are decisions we make almost without thought. But for the person with Alzheimer’s, sometimes even simple decisions can be overwhelming.

              In the past, when Larry and I would go out to eat, I was always the one who couldn’t decide what to order. It was particularly true if it were a new place, or if they had an extensive menu. Larry could scan the menu and know almost immediately what he wanted to eat. But on this part of our journey, he’s the one who can’t decide, not because of the choices, but because he’s overwhelmed with them.

              When we go to our regular places, he’s comfortable ordering because he always asks for the same thing. Now, new places and new menus are overwhelming for him. Ordering our food is easier if I make suggestions for him, after all we’ve been married long enough I usually know what he will like and he goes with what I suggest. But I’ve learned that I need to only suggest one thing at a time; two or more options are too confusing for him. He can’t decide, but he trusts me to guide him to the right choice.

              There are days when I have to make decisions, and trust God for guidance. What do I do about this or that problem at the house, who do I call for repairs? These are all things I’ve always relied on Larry for, and now he’s not able to take care of them. Yes, I was very spoiled being married to a man who could fix anything. So far, I’ve learned how to take the shower head off in our bathroom so I can soak it in vinegar and remove all the lime scale from the shower head. And then put it back on with plumbers putty so it doesn’t leak! Yea me! I learned how to put weather stripping around a door that was leaking air last spring when we had major wind blowing.

    Yes, I have Someone to guide me, so I know when I need to figure something out and take care of it myself, or call a friend for help.  

              “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding;

    In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

  • I Didn’t Plan This Trip – Friends Along the Way

    “A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity.” Proverbs 17:17

              We’ve been blessed with many good friends throughout the years, many of whom we’ve kept contact with over time, even if only through Facebook. But there are a few who were special, and some of them have gone on to be with the Lord.

              When we lived in Lubbock, Larry became friends with his brother from another Mother at church. Brent, like Larry, loved bow hunting and they became hunting buddies, which is a whole other level of friendship. Brent taught Larry the fine art of bow fishing. After we moved to Plano, Brent and his family moved to New Orleans, and they continued to take bow hunting trips to New Mexico every January, and Larry would go to  New Orleans so they could enter bow fishing tournaments.

              Brent was exactly the friend Larry needed when they met. Brent was a very godly man, and was an example to Larry of what it meant to be a man of God. Brent was Larry’s confident, and Larry shared his doubts and struggles with him, and Brent always had Biblical answers and would pray over him. (I only learned this after Brent passed.)

    Then, in the summer of 2005, Brent was in a terrible auto accident that left him a paraplegic and no longer to do the things he loved. He was on his way to Lubbock from New Orleans when the accident happened, and the closest trauma hospital was in Ft Worth. He spent months in the hospital, and finally was able to be moved to the Baylor Rehab in Dallas. On October 19th, Larry fell off the roof of a 2-story house where he was working in Dallas. The ambulance took him to Baylor Hospital downtown Dallas.  When Brent heard about Larry’s accident and that he was in the hospital, he got his son to escort him, in his new motorized wheelchair, from the Rehab hospital to the main hospital to see Larry. A true friend in time of need. Brent’s family moved back to Lubbock, closer to their extended family, when Brent finally was dismissed from the Rehab hospital. A few years later, he moved on to heaven, and Larry grieved his friend.

    Another good friend Larry met when we moved back to Central Texas. Larry Smith was also a very godly man, a leader in our new church. And he was a hunter! Finally after twelve years, Larry had another hunting buddy! I don’t think they had the same level of friendship that Larry had with Brent, but Larry S. and his precious wife Alice took us under their wing when we were new members at church and helped us feel a part of the body there. Sadly, Larry S. graduated to glory in 2020, and a short time later Alice moved back to Ohio where her daughter lived and she had other family.

    Then there was Jim, who was married to my best friend, Lorna. When Larry lost his job, Jim was there for him, inviting him over to help with the pool table he was building. And as soon as it was finished, Jim regularly had Larry over to play pool. Another friend in time of need.

    If I were to talk about every person God has brought into our lives, this post would be way too long. But, even now, as we’re walking through this hard time of life, God is blessing us with true friends. My circle of friends at church are so special, allowing me to cry on their shoulders at times, and praying with me always.  There is one couple who always invite us to sit with them when we all go out to lunch after church, even though they understand Larry can’t carry on a normal conversation, partly because he can’t hear well in noisy places, and partly he can’t always remember what he wants to say.

    But even as precious as all these people are, and many many others as well, have been, there is One who has always been here with us, and has promised to never to leave us, Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. I rely on my friends for support, but in the dark hours of the night, it is Jesus Who I call on for guidance, comfort, and peace.

    “…but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”  Proverbs 18:24b

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

  • I Didn’t Plan This Trip – I Just Don’t Have the Words

    I Didn’t Plan This Trip – I Just Don’t Have the Words

    “Give ear to my words, O Lord, Consider my meditation.

    Give heed to the voice of my cry, My King and my God, For to You I will pray.

    My voice You shall hear in the morning, O Lord; In the morning I will direct it to You, And I will look up.” Psalm 5:1-3 (NKJV)

              “I just don’t have the words” – how many time do we say that phrase meaning we just can’t explain what we saw or experienced. Perhaps it was too beautiful to describe, such as the majestic Rocky Mountains. Perhaps it was something miraculous, such as seeing someone healed. Or too horrible to describe, like the aftermath of a tornado or hurricane. There is another reason – we actually forget or lose words. This is called Aphasia.

    Aphasia can be mild and normal as we age. Talking to a friend, we may not be able to recall the name of a person or place, but only later to have it come back to mind. No cause for alarm, it’s common in older adults. But for the person with Dementia, it’s much more serious.

    “Difficulty with language and communication (Aphasia), is a common symptom in dementia, especially as the condition progresses. It arises from the damage to language-processing areas of the brain caused by dementia. This can manifest as problems understanding or using language, including difficulty finding words, forming sentences, and understanding what others say.” (Google)

    This is where we are.

    When Larry and I were first married, he was the outgoing one. The person who talked to everyone at church or social events. I’m naturally introverted, and have always been uncomfortable at parties and social events. Even with family, he was the one joking and teasing. He especially loved teasing my Mother, and she loved teasing back. Dad and I were content to listen on the perimeter. Larry made friends easily and with most everyone he met. I had fewer, but closer, friendships. He was a natural born salesman because of his outgoing personality.

    As the Alzheimer’s has progressed, he has become quieter. He still enjoys going to church every Sunday, and wants to get there early so he can have a cup of coffee with the guys. And he enjoys going to the Men’s Bible study on Wednesday evenings when I can take him. But he’s the quiet one now.

    I was updating my sister and cousins on a Zoom call last Saturday about Larry’s condition, and my sister said that when she and her husband visited us last July, she noticed that Larry wasn’t as outgoing as he used to be. And there it is. Because he can’t always find the right words, or form a cohesive sentence, he just stays quiet. I’ve noticed that often when someone says something to him, he just laughs (sometimes inappropriately!) and I believe that’s because he didn’t comprehend what was being said.

    And that is the other side of the coin – Comprehension. There are days that I have trouble explaining something to him. He just can’t understand the meaning of the words I’m saying. I’m learning to use shorter sentences because if I give too much information at once, he’s forgotten the first part of what I said the time I finish.

    This is something else we’ve lost on this trip. Our ability to communicate. There used to be a time when we could almost finish one another’s sentences, we were so in sync. We talked about everything – the kids, church, politics and what was going on in the country. We said “I love you” frequently, at least once a day. What I miss the most is talking in bed at night before we kissed goodnight and fell asleep.

    Part of my prayer for myself is that I can be patient when I need to be patient in communicating with Larry on his bad days, especially in the evenings.

    ” (I pray) that you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all might, according to His glorious power, for all patience and longsuffering with joy.”  Colossians 1:10-11

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

  • Give Yourself Grace

    “Put on, therefore, as choice ones of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humble-mindedness, meekness, long-suffering,

    forbearing one another, and forgiving each other, if any one with any one may have a quarrel, as also the Christ did forgive you — so also ye”

     Colossians 3:13, 14, Young’s Literal Translation

              Growing up in the Baptist Church, I heard a lot about grace. After John 3:16, the first scripture I learned was Ephesians 2:8-9 – “For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.” I could quote it in my sleep, but I don’t think I really understood grace until much later in my Christian walk. Now I understand that as believers, we have received the grace of God, and we are called to show that same grace to others.

    As full-time care-givers, sometimes the “other” is ourselves. Just as we sometimes got it wrong when our kids were growing up, we’ll get it wrong sometimes now too. I know I do! Some days are harder and longer than others. I get tired and just want to sit in a quiet place and rest. And as soon as I do, he needs me to “fix” the TV and find him the program he wants to watch, even thought he doesn’t know what it is. The temptation can be strong to lash out – “why can’t you remember how to use the remote! It’s the same one we’ve had for years!” Not the best response, tired or not.

     We must learn to forgive ourselves and show not only our loved one who is struggling grace, but grace to ourselves as well. The second definition on the Merriam-Webster dictionary of Grace is: approval, favor, mercy, pardon. The Oxford Dictionary says courteous goodwill. I could use some of that!

    I think sometimes early on, my frustrations over what he can’t do any more stemmed from denial – I didn’t really want to believe that my husband has Alzheimer’s and will never be the same. As I’ve grown into acceptance, I find myself getting less frustrated and more patient. The other side of the coin of acceptance can be depression, but I’ll save that for another day!

    “Be gentle and forbearing with one another and, if one has a difference (a grievance or complaint) against another, readily pardoning each other; even as the Lord has [freely] forgiven you, so must you also [forgive].”  Colossians 3:13 (Amp Bible, Classic Edition)

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

  • The Happiest Time of the Year?

    “Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him, The help of my countenance and my God.”  Psalm 42:11

    For many people, the holidays are a time of celebration, parties, and happy family gatherings. But for some, that is not always true. Empty chairs are a reminder of loved ones who are not here this year. Memories of sad times are more poignant and a reminder of past loses and failures. Deployed family members are missed more sharply during Christmas celebrations. So how do we cope? Those who are Christians, often experience guilt over not being happy during the season we celebrate the birth of our Lord, adding to our feelings of loneliness, sadness and depression.

              Temporary holiday blues can be due to unrealistic expectations, overplanning, and overspending which adds to stress. These are things which can be corrected by less shopping, and keeping expectations of a good holiday more realistic.

              But what about those who are experiencing real hurt, who are missing loved ones or who suffer from S.A.D. (Seasonal affective disorder, a type of depression that occurs usually during fall or winter.) These feelings are real and cannot just be dismissed.

              Here are just a few things that God has shown me over the years.

    1. Celebrate the life of your loved one who has passed. Enjoy the memories you have of them, and remind yourself, that if they were believers in Jesus Christ, they are celebrating in heaven.
    2. Give yourself permission to cry and call out to God, being honest with your Heavenly Father. Many of the Psalms of David were him calling out to God, reminding himself to praise Him even when times were bad.
    3. Take care of yourself physically. Get plenty of rest, go for walks or do other exercise. Shower and get dressed, even if you don’t feel like it. Sisters, style your hair and put on your make-up. Brothers, shave or trim your beard. Eat healthy meals, and limit carbs and sweets.
    4. Spend time alone with God, meditating on His Word and praying. The Psalms are an excellent place to spend time meditating.
    5. Look for someone else to bless. Take a meal to someone who is also missing a loved one. Call or text someone you haven’t connected with in a while. Give a lonely child, or adult, a hug. Ask God to show you who He  would like for you to reach out to and bless.
    6. Spend time with others, especially other believers. When we’re depressed, our tendency is to shut ourselves out from other people. While that is ok occasionally, we mustn’t allow that to become our norm. Go to church. Go to family events. Go wherever God leads you.
    7. Seek help. If your feelings become overwhelming, there are people ready and able to help you. Counseling with a Christian counselor can help you work through those feeling. But if you start having thoughts of suicide, call for help immediately. In the USA, you can call or text 988 to get help.

    When the Apostle Paul wrote to the Philippian church to “rejoice, and again I say rejoice” he was sitting in a nasty Roman prison, facing certain execution. Here’s just a few of the things he wrote in the 4th chapter of Philippians:

    V. 4 “Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!

    V. 6-7 “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

    V.8 “Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.”

    God didn’t create us to be down, sad or depressed. Jesus said that He came that we might have LIFE and have it more abundantly. So my prayer for you during this Holiday Season is that regardless of your circumstances, that you will receive the joy of the Lord, and the peace of God to surround you.

    If you don’t know Jesus Christ as your personal Savior, He’s ready to receive you, that is why He came and went to the cross. Pray “Lord Jesus, I acknowledge I am a sinner and need a Savior. I repent of my past sins, and I ask You to come into my heart right now. I believe You died on the cross for my sin, and You were resurrected on the third day. I receive you as my Lord and Savior, and I choose to live for You from this day forward. Amen”  Welcome to the family of God!

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

  • “…that the Son of God may be glorified”

    In the 11th chapter of the gospel of John, Jesus received word from Mary and Martha that their brother Lazarus was sick. But Jesus stayed two more days before he went to Bethany to see them. (v.6)

    “When Jesus heard that, He said ‘This sickness is not unto death but for the glory of God that the Son of God may be glorified through it.” John 11:4

    Jesus already knew what he was going to do, he would raise Lazarus from the dead. It must have seemed to Mary and Martha that Jesus was being insensitive to their brother being sick. But Jesus had a greater plan from the Father, that He would raise Lazarus from the dead thus bringing glory to the Father.

    Many people watched and many more of us saw on replay President Trump being shot at a rally on Saturday. It is nothing less than miraculous that he turned his head at the last moment and avoided being shot directly into his brain. Since Saturday, questions have arisen about how security could have been so lax. There were people in the audience who saw a man with a gun on top of a building and tried to alert the police. Their pleas went unacknowledged by the police and the Secret Service. There will be ongoing investigations, and hopefully the truth will come out. However if God could cause President Trump to turn his head at just the right moment, do you not think he could have moved security agents to check out reports of a shooter?  

    Could this shooting have been allowed to bring glory to God and cause President Trump and his supporters to see that God is greater and give the glory to Him? Yes, President Trump has said himself that it was God who protected him. Those who believe in God and the Lord Jesus Christ all know that it was God who caused him to turn his head at just the right moment thus saving his life. All glory be to God the Father and our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

    At the same time that we praise God for protecting President Trump, we mourn with the families of those who were shot and the man who died protecting his family. Evil doesn’t care who it destroys. The target was always Donald Trump, and the others were just innocent bystanders. Let us pray for the families of the other victims that God will heal their hurts.

    “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.” Romans 12:15

    Peace and blessing to you in the Name of our Lord Jesus Christ

    Dee

  • Be The Church

    “We will never change the world by going to church. We will only change the world by being the church.”

    I saw this quote on a Facebook post, and I agree, but what does it mean to “be” the church? Are we supposed to walk around saying Bless you my child to people? That’s pretty meaningless. So assuming the Church is made up of Jesus’s disciples, what did say to His followers before He ascended into heaven?

    “Then Jesus said to those Jews who believed Him, “If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed.” John 8:32

    We have to spend time in The Word to know how to be the Church.

    “By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” John 13:35

    The outward evidence that we are disciples of Jesus, the Church, is our love for other believers. Too many times the world has been witness to church disputes, so called Christians speaking negatively about other churches or other believers. Where is the love? The Apostle Paul said in his letter to the church in Ephesus to “speak the truth in love”.

    The Gospel of Mark records these instructions that Jesus gave His followers, “And He said to them, ‘Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature. He who believes and is baptized will be saved; but he who does not believe will be condemned. And these signs will follow those who believe: In My name they will cast out demons; they will speak with new tongues; they will take up serpents; and if they drink anything deadly, it will by no means hurt them; they will lay hands on the sick, and they will recover.” Mark 16:15-18

    Our assembling ourselves with other believers as we’re commanded to do, changes us. We hear the Word taught, and it empowers us to take Jesus to the world outside our assembly.

    And Jesus last words to the disciples before He ascended into heaven,  “But you shall receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you; and you shall be witnesses to Me in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth.” Acts 1:8

    The church is not a building, it is not even the meeting together of believers. The church is the individual believers, all parts of one body doing what Jesus said and being His witnesses.

    The early church went about teaching and preaching Jesus. They laid hands on the sick people who then were healed. They cast demons out of people in Jesus Name. They raised the dead. They did all the things Jesus did because He had said “You shall receive power and be My witnesses”. They believed Him and did what He said and changed civilization. They spread the gospel throughout the entire known world. They literally “turned the world upside down”.

    Is it not time for believers to really believe what Jesus said and take the gospel to the world? Show Jesus to the world by our love.

    Romans 2:4 says “Or do you despise the riches of His goodness, forbearance, and longsuffering, not knowing that the goodness of God leads you to repentance?” Show unbelievers the goodness of God by praying for the sick, by giving to the needy, caring for one another. Often in the gospels people came to believe Jesus was the Messiah when they saw the miracles. He showed them who He was by what He did. Maybe we need to show unbelievers who we are, the Body of the Anointed One, by what  we do.

    Yes we need to be in a Bible believing church and attend regularly. If your church doesn’t teach the Bible, or changes things in the Bible, then you need to find another assembly to go to to be fed.

    Our society is hurling toward destruction, wickedness is so prevalent we are becoming immune to it. Just as God gave people time to repent before the flood, He’s giving us time for people to repent now. And just as Noah was a preacher of righteousness, we’re to be preachers of righteousness to a lost world.

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

  • Rejoice in the Day God Has Made

    Rejoice in the Day God Has Made

    “This is the day the Lord has made;
    We will rejoice and be glad in it.”
    Psalm 118:24

    Psalm 118 begins with “Oh give thanks to the Lord, for He is good! For His mercy endures forever.” (NKJV) Some translations say His steadfast love or lovingkindness in place of mercy. That is probably closer to the literal meaning of the Hebrew word, chesed or hesed*. Hesed is also translated as kindness, goodness and favor.

    In verse 14, the psalmist says “The Lord is my strength and song, and He has become my salvation.”  How many days do we feel inadequate and like we lack the strength we need for the day? But because of His mercy and lovingkindness, God gives us strength.

    When we begin to understand God lovingkindness, mercy, steadfast love, kindness, goodness and favor towards us, praise will begin to pour out of us. And of course we’ll rejoice in the day, whatever it holds, it is the God has created and given to us!

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

    *Strong’s H2617

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