Category: Personal Growth

  • I Didn’t Plan This Trip – Making Choices

              “I call heaven and earth as witnesses today against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both you and your descendants may live”  Deuteronomy 30:9

    In the course of our lives, we have to make many choices. Whether to follow Jesus and choose Him is a major one. Choosing whether to marry, have children, where to live, starting or leaving a job, all important choices most of us have had to make at some point in our lives. Daily decisions like what to eat for lunch, what to wear, whether to get up with the alarm or to push the snooze button are decisions we make almost without thought. But for the person with Alzheimer’s, sometimes even simple decisions can be overwhelming.

              In the past, when Larry and I would go out to eat, I was always the one who couldn’t decide what to order. It was particularly true if it were a new place, or if they had an extensive menu. Larry could scan the menu and know almost immediately what he wanted to eat. But on this part of our journey, he’s the one who can’t decide, not because of the choices, but because he’s overwhelmed with them.

              When we go to our regular places, he’s comfortable ordering because he always asks for the same thing. Now, new places and new menus are overwhelming for him. Ordering our food is easier if I make suggestions for him, after all we’ve been married long enough I usually know what he will like and he goes with what I suggest. But I’ve learned that I need to only suggest one thing at a time; two or more options are too confusing for him. He can’t decide, but he trusts me to guide him to the right choice.

              There are days when I have to make decisions, and trust God for guidance. What do I do about this or that problem at the house, who do I call for repairs? These are all things I’ve always relied on Larry for, and now he’s not able to take care of them. Yes, I was very spoiled being married to a man who could fix anything. So far, I’ve learned how to take the shower head off in our bathroom so I can soak it in vinegar and remove all the lime scale from the shower head. And then put it back on with plumbers putty so it doesn’t leak! Yea me! I learned how to put weather stripping around a door that was leaking air last spring when we had major wind blowing.

    Yes, I have Someone to guide me, so I know when I need to figure something out and take care of it myself, or call a friend for help.  

              “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding;

    In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

  • I Didn’t Plan This Trip

    I Didn’t Plan This Trip

    “So do not worry or be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will have worries and anxieties of its own. Sufficient for each day is its own trouble.”

    Matt. 6:34 AMPC

    In 2020 my husband and I embarked on a journey we never planned. He was having some problems with his memory, and I had noticed he had difficulty with his thinking occasionally. He was already seeing a VA neurologist for restless legs, so we requested that he be tested. Since this was in the beginning of the Covid shut-down, the VA had cancelled all in-person visits. So, she ordered a brain scan at the local hospital, and a few days later over the phone she confirmed our fears – there were plaque spots on his brain that could indicate dementia. But at that time, she offered no treatment.

              It’s been 5 years now, and so much has changed. The journey we never signed up for. A journey we wouldn’t wish on anyone. Day by day, I’m having to lean on my faith in God and His promises more and more. Some days are better than others. And no two days are the same. That is what this blog is about, our journey. I pray that it will help others who are on the same journey, if nothing else just know you are not alone.

              I have no answers, even his neurologist has no definitive answers. The medications available are limited, and they do not offer a cure, they only offer limited hope that maybe they can slow it down.  The National Institute on Aging says “Alzheimer’s is a progressive disease, where dementia symptoms gradually worsen over a number of years. In its early stages, memory loss is mild, but with late-stage Alzheimer’s, individuals lose the ability to carry on a conversation and respond to their environment.”

              What I know is, Alzheimer’s is a despicable disease. Slowly stealing your loved one from you and your family. If you’re on this journey, you are not alone. I pray that you, and I, find our hope and peace in Jesus Christ.       

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

  • Move Your Body!

    “You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.

    Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.”

    Psalm 139:13-14 (New Living Translation)

                One of the beautiful things about how our bodies were created is the way we can move. Our elbows, fingers and knees work like hinges. Our shoulders and hips are like ball and joints. And in coordination with our muscles and our nervous system, these  parts of our body help us to move about throughout our day. God created us so wonderfully and marvelously and He made us to move!

                However, as we age we tend to be more sedentary and we do not move our body as we were created to do. As a result our muscles grow weaker, our joints get stiffer and we blame it all on aging. However, God did not create us to sit around and do nothing just because we have some higher numbers in our years or more gray in our hair.

                Weight bearing exercises such as walking or using handheld weights are essential for keeping our bones strong. Women especially are susceptible to broken bones because after their childbearing years are over estrogen, a hormone in women that protects bones, decreases sharply which can cause bone loss.

                When I was in my 40s and 50s, I was a member of a lady’s gym and regularly attended classes for Pilates. I believe those classes kept my body in much better shape than it had been in when I was younger. Not only did I do Pilates, I also worked with a trainer on weight exercises. I really loved the Pilates classes, but some of the weight exercises I had to do with the trainer, not so much!

                Now that I’m 75, I have all the aches and pains and movement issues too many people my age also have. After carpal tunnel surgery and a slow recovery, and now possibly needing rotator cuff surgery, I’ve decided I’m changing that.

                Not having a gym convenient to my location now is not an acceptable excuse. I have found an excellent Pilates teacher on YouTube. She even has exercise videos for seniors! And yes I even bought myself a pair of 3 LB handheld weights to start working with weights again and I fully expect to work back up to being able to use my 5 LB weights, and then even my 10 LB weights.

                So I want to challenge you to first, hold me accountable. And then second, won’t you join me? Yes our bodies are fearfully and wonderfully made and God fully intended for us to keep moving even in our gray haired years.

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

    P.S. Don’t laugh at the bronze statue – made it when I was in college! Great art! LOL

  • God’s Unrelenting Love

    “In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the atoning sacrifice for our sins.” 1 John 4:10

    The first song I learned as a child was “Jesus loves me this I know because the Bible tells me so.” And the first Bible verse I learned was John 3:16, “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that whosoever should believe on Him would not die but have everlasting life.” I had child faith in the truth of those words, but as I grechild-prayer-clipart-royalty-free-praying-clipart-illustration-216150w up I also heard, and believed other words presented as truth. Along the way the messages of the world began to drown out the message of God’s love for me.
    Turn on the TV or listen to the radio for even a little while and we can hear that we’re not thin enough so we need this diet or that medical procedure. Our job is inadequate so we need to go to this school or take that training program. Over and over we hear how lacking we are.
    Some messages we absorb from the world are subtle and more damaging to our soul. We compare ourselves or our lives to others and feel inadequate. We try to compensate by turning to other people, working harder at our job or even drugs or alcohol. But these are band-aides, incapable of healing deep wounds, and frequently only cause more pain. Meanwhile, God is calling us to Himself, whispering “I am the One who paid a great price for you, I am the One who heals, I am the One who can give your life meaning.” We must go back to that simple child-like faith and believe that Jesus loves us.
    When God sent His Son Jesus to the cross because He loved the whole world, it wasn’t just the whole world in general, but it was for every specific individual ever born of a woman. If you’d been the only person who ever lived, He’d have done it for you.
    I pray that you can know, can have intimate knowledge of how much God loves you. It’s not about who you are, how you look, where you came from, or even what you’ve done. It’s all about God and His love for you. He has assigned great worth and value to you. His love is unrelenting and it pursues you. He desires you to know Him and find your place and value in Him.
    Here is a prayer the Apostle Paul prayed for the church at Ephesus, and it is my prayer for you.
    “I pray that according to the wealth of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in the inner person, that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith, so that, because you have been rooted and grounded in love, you may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and thus to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, so that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God.” Ephesians 3:16-19 (NET Bible)
    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,


    Dee

     

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  • “I Will Give You Rest”

     

    “Come unto Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” Matt. 11:28

    What does that mean? In our crazy world, with our busy messy lives, how can we rest? Most of us feel like at times we need more hours in the day.

    Some of the definitions from the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary for rest are: (noun) repose, sleep; a place for resting or lodging; peace of mind or spirit; something used for support or (verb) free of anxieties

    Let’s consider some of these definitions.

    1. Repose, Sleep

    We all know our physical bodies need rest. Article I read list some of the health risks of too little or poor sleep.

    Weight gain/Obesity – people with poor sleep habits typically have a higher BMI (body mass index) than those who get 8 hours.

    Diabetes – inadequate sleep influences the way the body processes glucose and can contribute to Type 2 Diabetes.

    Heart Disease and Hypertension – insufficient sleep with people suffering from hypertension can cause elevated blood pressure, eventually increasing the risk of cardiovascular disease and stroke.

    Mood Disorders – Irritability and moodiness can be caused by a single sleepless night, and long term mood disorders such as depression, anxiety and mental distress have been connected to chronic sleep issues.

    Performance and Public Safety – Poor job performance and accidents can sometimes be attributed to lack of sleep.

    Life Expectancy – Studies show that sleeping five hours or less a night increased mortality risk by roughly 15 percent.

    God created our bodies to renew and refresh themselves through sleep. Cells regenerate and brains sort out superfluous information stored over the day. If you have trouble falling to sleep, ask God for restful sleep.

    Psalm 4:8 (AMP) says “In peace [and with a tranquil heart] I will both lie down and sleep, for You alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety and confident trust.”

    Psalm 127:2 says “It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows; for so He gives His beloved sleep.”

    Proverbs 3:24 promises “When you lie down, you will not be afraid; yes, you will lie down and your sleep will be sweet.”

    The Amplified Bible says in Proverbs 19:23 “The fear of the Lord leads to life, so that one may sleep satisfied, untouched by evil.”

    Sometimes, we need to take a break from whatever we are doing, especially when we are overwhelmed with activity and business.

    In Mark 6: 31, Jesus told the disciples to come rest awhile. “And He said to them, ‘Come aside by yourselves to a deserted place and rest a while.” For there were many coming and going, and they did not even have time to eat.’”

    The Greek word translated “rest” here is anapauð : (reflex.) to repose (lit. or fig. [be exempt], remain), by implication to refresh:-take ease, refresh, (give, take) rest. (Also the same word translated rest in Matt. 11:28) Jesus knew the disciples needed to take time refresh, take rest.

    1. Peace of mind or spirit; free of anxieties

    God created us as a three part being just as He is – He is Father, Son and Holy Spirit. We live in a physical body, we have a soul (mind, will and emotions) and we are a spirit.

    Not only does our physical body need rest, but also our mind and emotions. Sometimes the poor state of our physical body can affect our mental or emotional being, but we also need to rest, or refresh our mental state of being.

    We all have a certain amount of stress, it’s called life. But prolonged stress can damage our body, even to the point of serious illness or death. God did not create us to carry excess stress.  And He has given us instructions and the tools how to handle it.

    In 1 Peter 5:6, 7 tells us, “Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.”  We do not need to spend time stressing over situations, needs, problems especially those things we have no control over. We do need to acknowledge we are unable control it, and then cast it all over on God. And if that means we have to do it over and over, then we do it over and over, repenting for taking it back.

    A lady named Phyllis Ford said “Rest is displayed in our ability to yield to the presence of God, trusting that He is in control of our lives… We relinquish our ability to fix, manage, and control things.” Yield to God’s presence and trust He is in control. And trust Him that if there are things we can do or need to change, He will reveal it to us.

    Zephaniah 3:17 says “The Lord your God in your midst, The Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.”

    “He will quiet you with His love.” Just like a mother quiets her crying child with words of love and comfort, God will quiet our hearts no matter what is going on in our lives, even in the craziness sometimes if we only trust Him. God is in the midst of the worst circumstances and will quiet us with His love. He is the only one able to truly give us peace of mind.

    Jesus said in verse 29 of Matt. 11, “Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” The interesting thing here, the Greek word translated rest here, is anapausls : (from anapauð,) but it means – intermission; by implication recreation; – rest. Jesus is inviting us to come take a break from things with Him. Come to Him, and we can take an intermission from worry, from stress, from sorrow.  When I was on Grand Jury, some days were so very hard and at times depressing. No matter how hard I tried, I could not “unsee” or “unhear” some of the horrific photographs I saw or the disturbing testimony I heard. If I went home and brooded over things, I usually would have trouble sleeping, thinking about what I’d seen and heard. But If I went home, took a walk and invited Jesus to come along with me, and talked to Him about it, the burden of it always lifted and I was able to put it out of my mind and sleep that night.

    In the book of Acts Peter was thrown into prison, probably to be executed just as James his brother had been, what was his response? (Acts 12:5) He was asleep bound between 2 guards! Why? How? Because he’d cast the care of his life over on God.

    So when a stressful situation is keeping you up at night, pray “Father, I cast the care of this (whatever it is) over on You because I know You care for me. Now I will lay down and sleep because You have promised to give your beloved sleep.”

    Jesus said “Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me… Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” (John 14:1, 27)

    1. Something used for support or a place for resting or lodging

    Now just as rest is important for our physical bodies and our souls, rest is essential for our spirits. When we are physically tired, when we are mentally or emotionally stressed and drained, our spiritual life suffers and we are ineffective for the Kingdom of God. But equally, when we’re not refreshed and growing spiritually, our bodies and souls suffer. Each part of our being is dependent on the other – when one part suffers, our entire being suffers.

    What is it that is rest for us, that something we can use for support? Where do we go to find a place of resting?

    The NKJV of Psalm 94:12-15 says, “Blessed is the man whom You instruct, O Lord, and teach out of Your law, that You may give him rest from the days of adversity, until the pit is dug for the wicked. For the Lord will not cast off His people, nor will He forsake His inheritance. But judgment will return to righteousness, and all the upright in heart will follow it.”

    Now listen to it from The Message: “How blessed the man you train, God, the woman you instruct in your Word, providing a circle of quiet within the clamor of evil, while a jail is being built for the wicked. God will never walk away from his people, never desert his precious people. Rest assured that justice is on its way and every good heart put right.”

    “Providing a circle of quiet in the clamor of evil.” When we meditate on God’s Word, when we spend time alone with God, when we pray, God will provide a circle of quiet.

    In John 16:33 Jesus said, “These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.”

    Jesus is the One we can lean on for rest. In this life we will have problems, we will have conflicts, we will have family issues, we will have financial issues, we will have health issues. But Jesus says “In Me you can have peace.

    Why is this important?

    Today we are in a spiritual war as never before. There are things happening in the world, in our country, all around us, things that in the natural realm we have no control over. Satan is trying to destroy our nation, he wants to destroy our families, he wants to control our children.

    But in the spirit realm, we have power because Jesus said, “I will give you the keys (authority) of the kingdom of heaven; and whatever you bind [forbid, declare to be improper and unlawful] on earth will have [already] been bound in heaven, and whatever you loose [permit, declare lawful] on earth will have [already] been loosed in heaven.” (Matthew 16:19 AMP)

    The most important thing we can do for the Kingdom of God is pray. Pray Spirit led, Word based prayers. The last phrase of James 5:16 says, “The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.”

    But if we’re struggling in our own soul, if we’re worn out, how effective can we be?

    Matthew 28:18a says “And Jesus came and spoke to them, saying, ‘All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth.  Go therefore..”

    We have been given the authority in Jesus’ Name, we have been commissioned by Jesus, to work for the Kingdom of God. But we have to be ready and be prepared before we can be effective in this Kingdom work. We have to be ready for battle when God calls us.

    We have to be physically and mentally ready as well as spiritually prepared for do Kingdom warfare.

    The Bible says of Jesus: “Early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left [the house], and went out to a secluded place, and was praying there.” Mark 1:35 (AMP)

    Jesus began His day, spending time with the Father, listening to what the Father said. If you’re not an early riser, ask the Father what time He’d like you to meet with Him and ask Him to help you to set your schedule accordingly. We have to fit our schedule into God’s plans, not expect God to fit His plans into our schedule. Spend time during the day just quietly sitting, listening for His voice. You can pray, or not; read your Bible or not; but just bask in His presence.

    Listen to Jesus speaking in Matthew 11:27-30.

    “Jesus resumed talking to the people, but now tenderly. ‘The Father has given me all these things to do and say. This is a unique Father-Son operation, coming out of Father and Son intimacies and knowledge. No one knows the Son the way the Father does, nor the Father the way the Son does. But I’m not keeping it to myself; I’m ready to go over it line by line with anyone willing to listen.

    ‘Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.’”

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee

     

  • Do You “Have a Dream”?

    “And it shall come to pass in the last days, says God, that I will pour out of My Spirit on all flesh; your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, your young men shall see visions, your old men shall dream dreams.” Acts 2:17

    Do you have a dream for your life? I’m not talking about just a general dream or idea of what you’d like to do with your life or how you’d like to live. I’m talking about a God-given, God-inspired dream? Something so big that only God could bring it about?

    We all get ideas and have dreams of doing something – a career, a family, success in life, financial security. But how can we tell if the dream we have is something from God or just our own imagination or desires? There are “good ideas” and there are “God Ideas”. We want to pursue the God Ideas.

    To understand what God’s dream is for us, first we need to believe that He has a dream or a plan for us individually. Then we need to set ourselves apart to learn what it is. Habakkuk 2:1 says “I will stand my watch and set myself on the rampart, and watch to see what He will say to me, and what I will answer when I am corrected.” Put yourself in a position to hear from God. Does He speak to you while you’re sitting alone in your house reading your Bible, or maybe while you’re listening to music? Where ever you need to be, get quiet before Him and ask the Holy Spirit to speak into your heart.

    The Scripture goes on to say in verses 2 and 3 “Then the Lord answered me and said: ‘Write the vision and make it plain on tablets, that he may run who reads it. For the vision is yet for an appointed time; but at the end it will speak, and it will not lie. Though it tarries, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry.’”

    Write out what you think God is saying, whatever the dream or idea is, write it out in detail and look at it. Pray over it, submitting yourself and your plans to God’s will.

    Question it.

    • Is this something that will bring glory to God or only something that you want for yourself? 
    • Will it enlarge the Kingdom of God, will it bless or encourage other believers or is it something that will only benefit you? 
    • Is this something that will cause you to grow in your walk with Christ or pull you away from Him?
    • Does what you have written about it have a Scriptural basis, is it Biblically sound or does some part of it go against God’s Word?

    As you continue to pray and seek God’s will, He will reveal to you either Yes or No, whether it is for Now or for Later.

    When Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr wrote his now famous “I Have a Dream Speech”, was he only thinking about himself, or was he thinking about other people, the multitudes suffering from injustice? He was a minister of the gospel, and had the heart of a pastor. His concern was for others and for the generations to come else he would not have risked so much for the dream God had planted in his heart for equality for all people.

    Rev. King risked all to follow the dream God gave him. And ultimately it cost him his life. But he was obedient and today we can see the fruits of his labor. Our society still needs improvement, the world will never be entirely just and righteous until Jesus returns to reign on the earth. But we have come a long way from where we were in 1963 when Rev. King gave his speech towards the day when men and women, boys and girls are not “judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.”

    Do you have a vision or dream for your future or your life? God does and He wants to reveal it to you. Jeremiah 33:3 says ‘Call to Me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know.’

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,
    Dee

  • Cleaning Out the Clutter

    Deena | Joy | Dee | Leslie | Patty | Shawnee | Shaunta

    Day 17 Outfits

    Today’s Challenge Outfit called for black blazer, white shirt, skinny or straight jeans, leopard belt and nude heels. Since the black blazer I’d ordered had to go back because it didn’t’ fit, I subbed in a black cardigan. And because I’m hard to fit in heels, I don’t have nude heels so I chose my comfy neutral flats.

    Since joining this wardrobe challenge, I’ve done a lot of cleaning out. First of all, I had to clean out my closet. The closets in our house are very small, so there is no room for unnecessary items. And even though I use a second closet to store my off-season clothes, my main closet can get very crowded and cluttered.

    The first thing I did was pull out any clothes, including the shoes, that I just don’t enjoy wearing. If I don’t enjoy wearing something, I don’t wear it and it just takes up precious space in my closet. Second, I pulled out all the things that don’t fit any more. There is no room for things that I can’t zip unless I take off the weight I’ve slowly put on the past few years. It’s time to be honest with myself: I probably will never be that thin again. Off to the Good-Will they went. By that time, I’d made room for the new things I wanted to purchase to update my wardrobe and participate in the challenge. Now all the clothes in my closet fit the following criteria:
    1. Do I enjoy wearing this?
    2. Does this fit?
    3. Is it on trend or can it be styled with something new to refresh it?

    Then I cleaned out my dresser drawers and reorganized all my accessories and my jewelry. And in full disclosure, no jewelry went to Good-Will; I enjoy it all, even the old stuff from my mother.

    All this closet clearing set me to thinking about my personal life. What things am I holding on to in my life that are just using up time and not contributing to my life? What am I allowing to steal minutes, or even hours from my day? I am taking a hard look at the things that occupy my mind and my attention. Maybe instead of listening to talk shows of people just mouthing their opinions about things they know little about, I could spend more time working on my writing. Instead of playing a computer game, I could spend more time talking to my husband or writing letters to far away friends and family. Yes, more than just my closet needs cleaning out. I’m still a work in progress, inside and out.

    “See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil.” Ephesians 5:15-16 (NKJV)

    Peace and blessings in our Lord Jesus Christ,
    Dee

  • New Challanges

     

    Deena | Joy | Dee | Leslie | Patty | Shawnee | Shaunta

     

    I’ve always loved pretty clothes. Playing dress-up was my favorite pastime when I was a little girl. When I became an adult and got a grown-up job, first as a graphic designer, then art director, then freelance designer and eventually back to the corporate world as an executive administrator, I had to look professional and dress accordingly. Somewhere along the way, I lost my joy of dress-up and even worse, lost my sense of personal style.
    That is why I signed up for Build Your Wardrobe Basics Challenge. I want to re-learn style and to find once again my own personal sense of style. And I can tell you, it is already beginning to pay dividends. I’m feeling more confident every day I dress. I’m figuring out what really works for me, and even finding out things I’d never tried before can work. I am back to being that little girl playing dress-up!

    I love this color blouse.
    I love this color blouse.

    Had not planned to leave the house, but was so happy when I did need to that I dressed to go!
    Had not planned to leave the house, but was so happy when I did need to that I dressed to go!

    Day 4 Outfit
    Putting together individual pieces.

     

    So the moral is this, keep on having fun and playing dress up!

    “Her clothing is fine linen and purple.” Proverbs 31:22b

    Grace and peace to you all in our Lord Jesus Christ,

    Dee